oh well

Keep disregarding me
It turns me on
Please don't stop ignoring me
"You're doing it wrong,
If you want to be remembered
You have to leave before you've
Been around too long."
So I lost my wallet
It wasn't a satisfying goodbye
But you didn't let it at that
And now I've got nothing but time
Miss you sweetie
You'll never be mine
Get me out of here baby
Sick of city lights
I want oceans of sky
Where it's nothing but
Star shine reflecting
Landlocked blues
anything but I love yous

insomnia is a bitch

"Well I'll start by kissing your lips for a while"
You're still spinning
And I can tell by the way things
You want to say are blurred
"As you stare in my eyes"
And you're getting clearer
But the things I want to say
Are never nearer to leaving my mind
Hell, you have to know by now I'm
Always sleeping in a world
where you're mine
"Felt like I let them down"
As you confess something
Other than lust for almost
The first time, I remember
My eyes meeting yours
Darling, under the night sky
Replay seeing you
for the first, last, and every time
And I can't help but take it
All in, as my electra complex
Drives me, and your very touch
Electrifies me
"One day I can make your dreams come true"
And I want nothing more than to wake up next to you
But in honesty, reality is not that easy
We may never do anything we wanted to
Yet every time I'm almost happy
There you are
Reminding me there's still more to life
While I miss riding in the back seat of your car

its 3:24 am, i cannot shake you from my mind
no matter how hard i try
you are engrained there
and the tears well up in my eyes
like a million tries to get you home
like a million wishes that you would pick up the phone
i cant accept it
like a child who wont be told no
i simply cant let you go
i no longer know if its romantic
platonic, ironic- something
that you should be hurt by me
and in the end
i am hurt by you
"you never meant to"
but you did
oh god you did
sweet revenge is how they spin it
no good bye is how i pin it
and all i want to do is hop in my car
and drive to your house
and see what all the fuss is about

Infatuation like I havnt
Felt since grade school
The thought of my skin
On your skin in the damp
Dirty southern cool
You have me reckless
Hopeless, so giddy I'm floating
And when did you get so romantic
You have me checking my
Phone, frantic
I dont know what your getting at
Going so far for something like me
For a few fucks an a girl you'll barely see
were perfect for eachother
"move to me" you move me
I guess, yes I'd give up
Anything, everything
Promise and I'll leave
I'll promise to leave
You take the lead

had i known
how quickly you
would be gone,
i would not
have slept away
any of the hours
in the day
just so i could
spend more time
with you
had i known
i would have
faced deprivation hallucinations
and eventually death
from the hours
weeks
days on end
i would have given up sanity
had i known
you would be gone
so so quickly
i would have taken
back every word i said
i would have sent
every letter i never sent
given you every flower i picked
and made you mine
even for a short time
had i known

i have to hold myself back
from falling for you
fair skin
fair hair
bright eyes
its the tone of your voice i think
when it gets high up
and you squeal with excitement
the sheer happiness painted on your face
i want to be the reason
but i wont
i will sit back
and day dream
while you sing and you scream
and you surprise me with your everything

anniversary

You should have just asked
You were all I ever wanted
Phone calls past four in the
Morning when the sun is just
About to rise and I am finally
Closing my eyes
And I romanticize- I day dream
Or at this point I just plain dream
That you rang because your
Falling asleep thoughts
Let you think your way over
To me

You could have just asked
You were all I ever wanted
Still at any distance
I would go any distance
From point a to b
To c and z
I would follow or lead
Or think these awful things
Because in truth
We are platonic
You and I, I suppose
If one were to put us on paper
But I've got all these dreams
And you still take her
To your room to sleep
Or maybe you finish up
And have her leave

You wouldn't do that to me
I wish you had just asked
You were all I ever wanted
And I don't know what you are now
Or who you have become
Or even if that someone is different
From the someone I guess I loved
You suggest summer
And I accept nonchalantly
While my insides rise and I
Am sick to my stomach
But my heart can not stop beating to rest
I think about how you disgust me
And how I want to rip your heart from your chest